by Taryn Grant
I have not found one single parenting blog that addresses this, so I am about to address it. Here is your daily dose of what to do if…
Imagine you ask your kids where they want to go for a treat and they say the bookstore so great. They are five and eight now, so it’s time to relish in the fact of no diapers and no toddler chasing, but then wait… turn your head for a nano second and the younger one has climbed into a highchair. No, you heard me right.. A highchair designed for a 1-2 year old and not a fifty four pound sack of potatoes.
Order your chai anyway you might say, well I did.
But hold on, because the second you take a sip, he dumps a cup of water all down his front and then as soon as you finish cleaning it up, he decides he wants to get out of the little infant bucket he has crammed himself in.
I know , I know you did the Miley Cyrus arm video on YouTube this morning, but hey girl you got this, keep your cool little momma,
so…
attempt to lift that munchkin and what’s that he won’t come out? and people are looking now? and the guy off to the corner with the nice laptop and the good shoes is texting his girlfriend, #birthcontrol –click send.
Fast forward five minutes and strangers are helping you wedge that screaming five year old from the highchair and someone has called a manager for a screwdriver, to dismember this ever-loving high chair , until finally in an act of god, you get him to do some form of yoga and pilates and slip unscathed out of the highchair. In that moment you will want to have a good ol’ Hollywood meltdown, but my advice to you is gather those little cherubs into whatever contraption you came in and head the heck home.
A co-worker and friend tells me they will be okay in the end. That is what I have to believe.
About the Author
Hello, I’m Taryn Grant, a kindergarten teacher in Gardiner Maine. I have been teaching kindergarten for nine years and raising two kids for most of that time. I am very passionate about teaching, but never pretend to be the best at my profession or at parenting my own two. I love to share my imperfections through writing. I hope you can relate and enjoy.
Oh my gosh so funny! I love your voice in this piece. I have a 6 year old and 4 year old and I can relate! Never gotten stuck but lost my 6 year old on the lazy river at Hershey Park and it remains one of the scariest moments of my life. Momming and teaching are both so hard! (I taught K for 10 years and I bow down to you… teach 3rd now!)
LikeLike
Oh my gosh…your words painted the picture perfectly! We start each summer morning with such hope and good intentions! Sometimes I think having a classroom of 30 all school year is easier than a summer day with by 11 and 6 years olds : )- Love to hang out with moms who tell the real story!!! Great post!
LikeLike
Taryn,
This piece has my laughing and cringing! You’ve painted such a descriptive picture of the hilarity of that moment. You’re writing has such voice and depth. I hope you have written down many, many moments with your kiddos-they will cherish them one day, as we do now!
LikeLike
I loved reading this… I felt like I was one of those strangers watching and being thankful it wasn’t by 2 or 7 year old doing that! Although, I took her to Barnes and noble once, only to have her try to climb a display and then run off on me. I don’t wish to rush time at all, but it is moments like these that make me look forward to the older years!
LikeLike
I am so glad I am not the only one ! I am happy you can relate!
LikeLike